Wednesday, February 8, 2012

I have cracked. And no one can help me.

Hello lovely lovely people. Im probebly talking to myself, but thats good. I guess.

Ive been doing bad lately. and i cant go anywhere or tell anyone so i came here. Hope you dont mind.

Ive start purging unintentionally.
I mean im doing it on purpose, but i dont know how  it started. I am back up to 150 lbs unfortunatly, so ive been exercising and trying to eat right but its not working. Im just so lazy now i dont want to work out, and i eat EVERYTHING and anything. Ive lost control.
control.

I have no control. Its terrible. I just dont know what to do anymore. I might be slipping into depression or some kind of mental health issue. And i dont like it. Not one bit. My sister walked in on me while i was purging. I told her i was sick.




I dont know what to do anymore. I think im going to cry myself to sleep tonight, and i havent cried in a long long time. Im just not the crying type. Honestly, what is wrong with me?

Wrong?

I am sorry for coming here with all my problems. but i just didnt now where else to go. okay now... im going to bed now. tomorrow im going to eat 800 calories.

sweet dreams, loves!

3 comments:

  1. good luck with the 800 calories :) don't beat yourself up too much though, so many people go through the same stage that you are, i'm sure control etc will come back again, just hang in there, xo.

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  2. You're not talking to yourself, I'm here :) Hopefully you'll feel better in the morning xx

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  3. I hope your feeling better soon. It can get rough sometimes for me with depression... I started out strictly restricting and then just all of a sudden started to purge when I ate too much...I dont like it but cant help it when I feel to full.
    best of luck and keep your head up you can do it!
    Check out my blog if you car too

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